15 Reasons Why the St Louis Cardinals are the Worst
If you have been a fan of the Milwaukee Brewers for any period of time, you are probably included in a group, with myself, of people who cannot stand the St Louis Cardinals. It seems like half of the teams in the National League have had an issue with the Cardinals at one point or another, and most certainly everyone in the NL Central. I can’t remember a specific time when the Pirates had a beef with St Louis, but I’m sure there have been moments.
I’m going to borrow a quote from Brandon Phillips to illustrate my feelings about the Cardinals.
“We have to beat these guys. All they do is (whine) and moan about everything, all of them. I really hate the Cardinals. Compared to the Cardinals, I love the Chicago Cubs. Let me make this clear: I hate the Cardinals.”
Speaking of the Cubs, I’m actually surprised that LaRussa never filed a formal complaint against them for their atrocious “Go Cubs Go” song.
Cardinals fans always say that Brewers fans are jealous of their success, and while that does play a part, there are many more legitimate reasons for Brewers fans to hate the St Louis Cardinals. My top 15 are listed below.
1. Tony La Russa
While I don’t think that he was act ually upset about 85% of the things that he complained about, he sure was good at complaining. We all know that he did it just to get inside of the opponents’ heads – and it worked. Here are just a few of the things that good ole’ Tony has whined about in the past.
– The ribbon lights at Miller Park. They’re responsible for the Brewers winning some of the games against the Cardinals in 2011, apparently. Oh, and he’s very adamant about Brewers fans educating themselves about how many tiny bones there are in the hand. Oh, and don’t forget… “YOU CAN’T PITCH UP AND IN!!”
– The Colorado Rockies’ bullpen mound. Apparently it wasn’t up to MLB regulations, and that’s why Chris Carpenter lost his games against the Rockies in 2010. Yeah.
– The Cincinnati Reds’ fireworks smoke was interfering with the Cardinals’ ability to see. Pretty sure the smoke was the same for both teams, and almost every ballpark sets off fireworks. Once again, he blamed an element unrelated to baseball for a, wait for it, Chris Carpenter loss.
– The Cincinnati Reds rubbing down the baseballs too much before games. This is the reason the Cardinals lost against the Red s, apparently.
– The Brewers were stealing signs. This is the only reason they were able to beat, yes, Chris Carpenter. Boy, La Russa is sure concerned about Chris Carpenter.
- Refusing to go to a World Series press conference after a loss to the Texas Rangers in 2011. I’m pretty sure that’s against some kind of unwritten baseball rule. He was too busy pouting about accidentally getting Lance Lynn out of the bullpen when Jason Motte was the pitcher he wanted.
2. David Freese & Rafael Furcal
Two players who, for the most part, are/were just terrible against other teams. Of course, they dominate the Brewers each and every time we play the Cardinals
- David Freese – The last time the Brewers played the Cardinals, his grand slam against the Brewers was the first extra base hit he had hit in about 2 weeks. His last one…..came against the Brewers. The guy can’t hit this year, but he’s sure racking up the base hits and RBI when the Brewers come into town
- Rafael Furcal – Dude couldn’t hit a t all when he was trad ed from Los Angeles to St Louis in 2011. He had a measly .188 BA and couldn’t get an ex t ra bases to save his life. Yet when the Brewers came to town, he’d hit home runs like they were going out of style.
3. Yadier Molina
He might be one of the best catchers in the league, but he sure doesn’t know how to act his age. He throws fits when calls don’t go his way, gets right in the face of major league umpires, and has been suspended multiple times by the league for initiating contact with umpires. Not exactly someone who I would want little children looking up to.
4. Jeff Suppan throwing out the first pitch in the 2011 NLCS
Excellent trolling job, St Lou.
5. Having their 1982 celebration while the Brewers are in town
I’m pretty sure that was no accident. It was a random series in August. They could have picked literally any other time to celebrate their 1982 championship, yet they chose to do it on a weekend when the Brewers, the team who they beat in that World Series, were at Busch Stadium. Classy.
6. 2012 Wildcard game infield fly call
I’m still convinced they paid off the umpires in this game. Th is team seems to get ALL of the breaks. This has to be one of the worst calls in post-season history. Good job Sam Holbrook. Remember him? He was the ump who tossed Greinke in Houston last year after one pitch.
7. In 2011, they lost one of the best pitchers for the entire season….and still won the World Series
Then in the very next season, t hey lose their other “ace,” Chris Carpenter, for most of the season and they still made it all the way to the NLCS. Must be nice to have pitching. Must. Be. Nice .
8. Miraculous comebacks
This past off-season, they held a press conference announcing that Chris Carpenter had a possibl e career- ending injury. Now, he’s on pace to return to the starting rotation in July of this year. What? Only in St. Louis.
Adam Wainwright. He misses the entire 2011 season in order to have Tommy John surgery, and now he’s better than ever. I wouldn’t exactly call this a miraculous comeback, as other pitchers have still pitched well after having this surgery, but come on. I think having the surgery may have actually made him a better pitcher. Original elbow ligament? Who needs that?
Lance Berkman – In 2010, he was traded from the Astros to the Yankees and everyone was convinced that his career was over. People were talking about him possibly retiring when he signed a deal with the St Louis Cardinals. And, of course, he then rewards them with one of the best years of his career.
9. Their farm system ranks #1 in all of MLB
They are equipped to be good for a long, long time.
10. Their ridiculously large number of great starting pitching prospects
It seems like they’re calling up a new rookie pitcher every week to replace one of their injured veterans. The rookie pitcher then proceeds to throw 7 innings of shut out ball, leaving me angry and wondering why the Cardinals get all of the nice things. In Tyler Lyons’ major league debut, he went 7 innings and gave up 1 run. He is now 2-1 with a 2.66 ERA. Young pitcher Shelby Miller is also pitching out of his mind this year and has already given the Brewers trouble in his couple of starts against them this season. He currently has an ERA of 1.82 in 69.1 innings pitched and has 6 wins. They called up their best pitching prospect, Michael Wacha, last week. Of course, he pitched great in his major league debut. He also has the ability to occasionally throw a 100 MPH fastball, at least in the minor leagues. And the Cardinals just drafted him in the 2012 First-Year Players draft. I can only dream of the Brewers drafting someone li ke that and being major league ready alm ost immediately.
11. Chris Carpenter
Even Zack Greinke disliked this guy. His thoughts? ““Nobody really likes Carpenter. He yells at people […] People think he’s phony.”
What will he tell his son?
12. The fans
Classifying themselves as the “best fans in baseball.” I’m actually glad that I don’t have to deal with all of the pressure of remembering all of those unwritten rules of baseball etiquette that they follow down there.
13. The Postseason
They were the ones who stopped the Brewers both times that they were so close to the World Series trophy that they could almost taste it. I wasn’t around for the 1982 series, but I’m pretty sure that if I was, I would hate the Cardinals even more. Speaking of the 2011 postseason….
14. Written in the Stars
2011. They had no business being in the playoffs in 2011, let alone winning the World Series (thanks for nothing , Braves) . I am still convinced that Tony La Russa sold his soul to the devil (or perhaps, is actually the devil), in order to win that championship. Their bullpen was awful, and the move that they made to fix their bullpen would have been a mediocre fix for any other team. Yet for the Cardinals, the addition of those b ullpen arms and Edwin Jackson (think about this: Edwin freakin’ Jackson was the pitcher that put them over the top) saved their season. Somehow. The Cardinals fans’ #11in11 hashtag may have been one of the most insufferable things I have ever seen o n my timeline. I think I’m still suffering from PTSD from that NLCS. (Wait, what NLCS? I’m pretty sure that the 2011 World Series was actually canceled…)
15. Their annoying, winning ways
Since 2011, they own the Brewers. Even when you think the Brewers are playing terrible against the rest of the league and couldn’t possibly be any worse, they pull out a new kind of terrible when they play the Cardinals. And they have 11 World Series rings. 2 of them could have been ours. Man, I hate this team.