The Postgame Post Mortem: The Walking Dead Edition
Didn’t Charles Woodson famously say that the Green Bay Packers, minus Aaron Rodgers, is a 7-9 team? Hey Chuck, can I call you Chuck? you may be on to something there. Sigh. You all know the drill, people. Packers on the slab tonight.
- I’m totally serious, someone check Aaron Rodgers for bite marks. Because this? This is exactly the trope for a zombie apocalypse movie starts. You’ve seen this plot before. Brave and beloved hero goes down in spectacular fashion and power vacuum arise as he falls. Chaos ensues. And then said hero turns into a zombie. At this point, maybe he never really fractured his collar bone and it is a zombie bite. Could that make things any worse at this point? Players dropped like flies today. All we need is for the dead to rise. Talk about a self-fulfilling prophecy of suck.
- That said, prepare to be disappointed if you think Rodgers is going to be miraculous recovery this week. Standing on the sidelines, he was once again using his hoodie as a sling for his left arm.
- And since we’re talking about Rodgers, let’s stick with him. Dear Defense, you do realize that making the QB stroke out on the sideline because of your inaction will only delay his return because, well, he stroked out.
- So long, Seneca. We hardly knew you.
- If Wallace is hurt there’s no sense keeping around. Either IR or injury settlement. He was a stop-gap measure this year. No sense taking up a roster space at this point.
- Tolzien played a bit like a college football QB. Okay, a lot. But considering the last time he had this much playing time, he was wearing the Red and White of Wisconsin, he did not look half-bad. No, you should not toss INTs in the end zone. That’s poor form. But he looked more comfortable than Wallace. Liked that I saw Rodgers mentoring him on the sideline. Unlike other QBs, ours does think it his duty to raise up his understudies.
- So, about that Matt Flynn guy…We need a back up to the back up to the back up since the next best option at playing QB is apparently John Kuhn.
- McCarthy has already named Tolzien the starter next week. Because he’s the head coach. Don’t question testy McCarthy. He may turn into the incredible hulk.
- We really missed EDS after he went down.
- And holy mother of god is Marshall Newhouse is still terrible.
- Packers – Rodgers = Eddie Lacy. Unfortunately other teams have figured out that formula. But he is still the best weapon we have.
- Next person who suggests we bring Tebow in gets thumped. Hard. But you’ll need to get in line. Mark Tauscher is at the head of that line. Seriously, Tausch, TEBOW? Are you just trolling us at this point?
- Mike Daniels is a beast.
- Clay Matthews with a club is not.
- MD Jennings got burned.
- Dom Capers cannot adjust.
- Soft underbelly was open all night long.
Things could be worse. Rodgers could have Finley’s injury. Or he really could have been bitten by a zombie. Oh, and the Bears lost.
Next man up is apparently my 70 year old middle school gym teacher. Sigh.
We will endure. We always do.
Go Pack Go!