Pocket Doppler Prognosticators: Week 3
Once again the call has been made to gather the great Pocket Doppler Prognosticators to try to outsmart, outwit and outsnark each other. But let’s face it, it’s not as simple as calling, “Avengers Assemble!” More like herding cats if you ask me. This year yet another Founding Father
weenied out retired. This year’s crack team of suckers experts will include Founding Father Wally, Angels Colleen and Kelly, Favored King of Procrastination Stepson Rich and the relatively new spanks Thaddeus and Jay.
Colleen: 6 Kelly: 4
Rich: 4 Jay: 6
Green Bay at Cincinnati – Remember when a trip to Cincinnati to play the Bengals was just a formality as you knew the Packers were going to win, just had to get that pesky game out of the way. Well, times they have changed and the Bengals are a bona fide solid team now & early favorites to win the AFC North. Dalton has matured as a QB, AJ Green is a beast at wide out & rookie RB Giovani Bernard is coming off of a break out game where he made it to the end zone twice. What concerns me here in this game is the same thing that has concerned me the first two games, once again no Morgan Burnett. Tramon Williams will be on Green I’m guessing & Dom will give him Safety help over the top but I’m not too keen on who actually will be helping. No way the defense shuts out the Bengals for as long as they did Washington the week before, but I don’t think that will matter because if it turns into a track meet my money is on Aaron Rodgers & the Packers offense to put more points on the board. Packers win by a TD to head into the early bye week
Atlanta at Miami – Atlanta will win this game, they’ll win the crap out of it. I’m not sure there’s really much more to say about this match-up. So, well…hey, did you hear that Corey Hart would like to come back to play for the Brewers & is willing to give a discount to do it? It’s a pretty stand up move by Hart if you ask me. I’ve never been a big fan of Hart, not sure why but has never really clicked for me. I’m thinking the Brewers will bring Hart back but with the way Sean Halton has been playing late in the season, a true first basemen, I think the 3 will be an open competition come Spring Training.
Chicago at Pittsburgh – I have a hard time believing that Pittsburgh is 0-2. Not because they don’t deserve to be there but more so the Steelers are just one of those teams I’ve been conditioned to thing will be at the very least competitive year in and year out. It’s early so there could be a bounce back I suppose but it doesn’t look very hopeful. Oh, Chicago will win this one too.
Oakland at Denver – Remember what I said above about Atlanta winning the crap out of their game? Well Denver is going to win the shit out of this one. It’ll be 56 – 0 by halftime. Here’s something interesting though, did you know ‘This Night’ by Billy Joel off the Innocent Man album is based off of the Second Movement of Beethoven’s Pathétique Sonata? I remember the first time I made the connection, was in a intro Music History class in college, nearly fell out of my desk. Go listen to the Beethoven first (just the first couple stanzas should be enough), then the Billy Joel one, wait till the chorus starts you’ll hear it right away, obviously much quicker Oh, Barry Manilow took a lot of this themes from Chopin too, in case you were wondering.
Wally’s Picks: Green Bay, Atlanta, Chicago & Denver
We are living in the Aaron Rodgers Era of Greatness.
The guy had an all-time great performance against the Washington Redskins last Sunday, and a nation sort of shrugged its collective shoulders.
The reality is, it’s Aaron Rodgers’ world, and we’re just living in it. We need to appreciate and applaud; we need to stop and smell the roses.
You’ll tell your grandkids you saw Manning and Brady, and you’ll also tell them you saw Aaron Rodgers.
And here’s the beautiful part: He’s only just begun.
Atlanta at Miami –
Party in the city where the heat is on
All night, on the beach till the break of dawn
Welcome to Miami
Bienvenidos a Miami
Bouncin’ in the club where the heat is on
All night, on the beach till the break of dawn
I’m goin’ to Miami
Welcome to Miami
-Will Smith, Big Willie Style
Chicago at Pittsburgh – I’m still holding out hope my career as a comedian will take off before I reach my late 20’s. I’d like to practice if you don’t mind. Okay, here goes… who blocks for Jay Cutler?
Oakland at Denver – Do you recall that scene in Breaking Bad when Walt and Jesse melt a dead body in Jesse’s grandmother’s bathtub? Yeah, this game will be like that—except without the gore, maybe.
Rich’s picks: Green Bay, Miami, Pittsburgh, Denver
Green Bay at Cincinnati – Green Bay wins a nail biter over Cincinnati. The Packers offense is clicking and the Bengals secondary is banged up. But, Rodgers will be facing a very stout and aggressive defensive line. Hopefully, Rodgers can play upright all day. The Packers will put some points in the board for sure, but so will the Bengals. The Bengals have a very potent offense of their own with AJ Green and Giovani Bernard. The Packers are a little banged up in the secondary themselves, so this could turn into a barn burner before the clock runs out. Whoever has the ball last will probably be the winning team.
Atlanta at Miami - Atlanta will beat Miami. The Dolphins are an upstart team this year, and former Packers OC Joe Philbin has them playing good football. But, the Falcons are a sleeping giant. They are going to put some serious points on the board behind Julio Jones, Tony Gonzalez, and Matt Ryan. They will miss the injured Stephen Jackson, but the passing offense will just be too much.
Chicago at Pittsburgh – Chicago will win at Pittsburgh. This isn’t so much a ringing endorsement of the new Marc Trestman aerial circus as it is an indictment of aging Steelers. The Steelers have gotten slow and old in recent years, and I think this is the year the go over the cliff (but not the Spinal Tap 11 cliff). I foresee a rebuilding project in Pittsburgh starting next year. And, since the Steelers are missing their starting center to injury, Big Ben will be the one getting assaulted for a change.
Oakland at Denver – Denver absolutely throttles Oakland. The Raiders are horrid. I like what Reggie McKenzie is doing out in Oakland, but he inherited a mess worse than the SMU death penalty. It will take some time for the Raiders to be competitive on a weekly basis. Even though Denver just lost their starting left tackle for the season, the Broncos have too much firepower. They may even hang 45-50+ on the Raiders.
Jay’s Picks: Green Bay, Atlanta, Chicago, Denver
Green Bay at Cincinnati – Why does Green Bay have a week 4 bye? I feel like they’re just getting going? Anyway, the Packers had better make sure they don’t get punched in a mouth by sneaky Cincinnati team. Green Bay has their usual assortment of injuries so far. They’ll sneak out a victory 21-17.
Atlanta at Miami – Two teams that I know nothing about. I do know that Tony Gonzalez is on my fantasy team so he better make something happen! 35-10 Durty Birrds!!
Chicago at Pittsburgh- No need to take Ambien, folks! Watch this game! Over/under on interceptions thrown by both QBS? I’d take 3 and the over. Pittsburgh wins 24-21.
Oakland at Denver - Charles Woodson, come back and play safety for us! There’s some dude named “Guitar Johhny” or some string instrument playing safety for the Pack. No bueno! Just like my interest in this matchup! 27-20 Denver.
Thaddeus’ picks: Green Bay, Atlanta, Pittsburgh, Denver