Sailing the Seas of Cheese: We need the wood elsewhere!
The NFL Lock Out has been going on, what, a whole month now? So much for riding that warm fuzzy from the Super Bowl all the way until September.
Show us the books, one side demands.
You guys are a bunch of whiny little children*, the NFL counters.
The NFL has posted everywhere that they
have died for the players sins tried everything including offering solid gold toilets health care for life to appease the demands of the players. But they haven’t cornered the market on the martyr schtick. Portents of the apocalypse, people! This is so bad, the lock out has forced a webmaster to be put a passive aggressive redirect killed the NFLPA’s website! The horrors!
Blah blah blah, bang head against the wall repeatedly until the pain either goes away or you pass out. For the love of God, people, can you get off your collective crosses? I think we need the wood elsewhere.
So, Roger, Maurice, and the mediator whose name doesn’t mean a rip to me? Get your act together and sort this out. I don’t want to have to resort to drafting a dude who plays Madden 12 to create my fantasy football (videogame) team. If that’s the case, I am going to draft Aaron Nagler and maybe my team Three Orange Whips will actually have a season.
Other than grumble, I don’t have much to say about the Lock Out other than I am already fed up with it. So until football returns, here’s a slide show trying to sum up where we were a month ago and where we are now. (ie, in lieu of real content, please enjoy the flashing pictures!)**
* Insults including but not limited to Poopyhead, Dumbnut, and Fartnocker are courtesy of my four and seven-year-old girls. No copyright infringement intended.
**Apologies in advance to Luke Rodgers for shamelessly stealing his photo of Mustache + Elephant or whatever he’s calling it. And since I poached it, I feel obligated to pimp out the photo and implore you all to help him thumb his nose at some artsy schmartsy photo of two bicycles that is beating his in a contest. Go and vote for the guy here. If he’s got the stones to enter it, y’all should vote for him so he can go on a safari, or somethng.
***No clue why You Tube picked the image of Bieber to lead the whole thing. Trust me, it’s really about football. That little manchild is only in there for about a second.